“I thought condoms were a pair of fluffy dice you wore around your neck. I misunderstood a scene in a soap opera when I was very young and had always wondered how the hell they worked.”

“First time I heard anal sex I thought it was sex once a year.”

“God damn it…Joey told all the boys in our 4th-grade class that he had officially been told how sex works, and let us all know that in order to get a girl pregnant you must pee, from a distance, very accurately into her bellybutton.”

“When I was too young to understand cheating I thought it was random if a woman had a black child or a white child. So I was pretty dumb.”

“I thought ‘Sex Ed’ was my sister’s boyfriend.”

“I thought kissing and spitting in each other’s mouths was sex….then I found out about cum and I thought you cummed from your mouth. Yep.”

“I thought everyone just rolled around on the bed naked together and that was sex. I didn’t realize any insertion was required.”

“I used to think that oral sex was talking about sex with your partner.”

“I remember learning that sperm looked like little tadpoles and up until I was like 12 I didn’t know they meant microscopic tadpoles so I though that guys shot fucking tadpoles out of their dicks. Then I discovered jerking off and learned that no, we don’t shoot actual tadpoles out of our dicks.”

“An erection was just extra space to store urine.”

“I honestly thought that unprotected sex was just a 110% guarantee to get a girl pregnant. Sex with a condom? 85% chance to get her pregnant. Even after learning the truth, the stigma already made a deep mark in my psyche…”

“I thought jizz could make you go blind.”

“I thought that if a boy fell asleep with a girl that was how a girl got pregnant.”

“I thought girls didn’t poop, I thought that their period is when all the bad stuff came out. That lasted until I was 11 or 12.”

“I thought sex was literally when your hands did this thing”

“Well, my parents sorta glossed over the sex talk when I was 10 or so. Anyways, they left the part out about only needing the condom during sex, and that you needed to physically insert the penis into the vagina. I also though latex was a type of leather… So basically I believed that once dudes turned 15ish we all needed to constantly wear a thick leather dick glove or the women around us would get pregnant.”

“When I was younger, I had no clue boys had balls – I thought it was just a penis. THEN when I heard they had balls, I thought they just had balls and no penis, and was confused on what a penis was and if boys didn’t have them, then who did? I found out they had both and was even more confused, saw it and was grossed out. Lesson Learned: They don’t have to look good to feel good!”

“I knew ‘the P goes into the V’ to make a baby, but nothing after that. As though the guy just sticks it in, leaves it there (not moving) for a certain amount of time, and boom, she’s pregnant. Which, granted, it probably has happened that way for some people.”

“I thought having a girlfriend was illegal before you were 16.”

“I knew what ‘sex’ was (thank you ‘Last American Virgin’), but I thought that ‘screwing’ was sex, but where the man rotated/revolved around the woman, like a screw/screwdriver.”